Who Dat Girl?

I'm about to half-confess something I've never really told a soul.

There's this girl.

She loves the designers I love, in fact she loved them before I knew who they even were.

She has the job I want.

She got through school the way I wish I had, or currently was.

She associates with people I wanna associate with.

She's gorgeous.

She's brilliant.

She has amazing taste in clothes. Men. Food. Books. Music. Everything.

[And I am quite the snot when it comes to complimenting other people's taste.]

To me, she is fashion. She is living, breathing fashion.

While I think she's sort of an awful person, undeniably two-faced, a terrible friend, and ambitious to the point of throwing anyone at all under the bus, I envy her to pieces.

I want her work ethic. I want her wardrobe. I want her network.

I keep telling myself I don't want to actually be her because you know, everyone has a cross to bear, you don't know what it's like to walk in someone else's shoes, be careful what you wish for, yada yada yada.

Because, damn. I kinda wanna be her.

Or at least have all her shit.

There, I said it.

SIGH. OF. RELIEF.

♥ Lini.

It's Getting Hard To Be Someone

I am all for markers.

I am all for needles & thread.

I am all for drooling over buttons, beads, brooches, and brocades.

I just feel sometimes I am surrounded by people who are incapable of seeing beyond the four walls of [studio] classrooms or the pages of their [sketch]books.

I'm not really too concerned with them [them being various people I study with in my Fashion Design program] reading this, because I'm sure they're far too concerned with coming up with better ideas than everyone else yet complaining about how their garments are someone SO much more difficult. UG, fashion!

But anyway.

Tonight was the State of The Union Address.

Just that thing, ya know.

Tonight I also went to dinner with a handful of friends from my program at a lovely Indian restaurant.

Mind you, I love them all dearly, but when they were talking about politics and taxes and traveling and living abroad, etc. etc. I just wanted to shout "Put down that samosa sweetheart, and turn on your fucking televisions if you care so much about anything that just spilled out of your mouth."

May lightning strike me if I am wrong, but I feel quite certain none of them knew about that State of the Union thing which happened tonight.

It's not like it's hard to follow. Back in the day that shit was practically carved into stone and read from a mountain top, nowadays Mr. Barack has a Twitter.

Real talk right now: Barack Obama has a Twitter. Becha our parents didn't see that one coming.

I can be largely un-American. I despise weekends dedicated to football, condiments and potato salad make me cringe, and I think Greek life may singlehandedly be responsible for the abysmal quality of higher education in this country. But once a year it doesn't hurt to tune in to the elected leader of our nation's report on the good ole U-S-of A's status. I mean you can check Susie Q's status on Facebook on your iPhone every 15 minutes, but God forbid you see what's going on with health insurance, or you know, the 10 year war we're currently in.

I am not saying I am some enlightened, all-knowing being. [Believe me, if you spoke to me for more than 15 seconds you would see I am far from such.] I am just saying I miss being around people who stimulated my brain and I missed not constantly being under pressure to focus. Maybe if I wasn't daydreaming about how to attach a vinyl sleeve properly I could focus more on the world I live in.

The world you live in isn't just your major in college, your newsfeed, "overnight" success stories, or the way you look just because you've been instructed to focus so much on those things.

I could think about how to vote properly if I focused less.

I could remember the governor of my home state if I focused less.

I could have picked up a novel without being forced to if I focused less.

I could be more concerned with the fact that I am 22 years old I honestly just realized this week that "sponjes" is not how you spell that lovely little thing you wash dished with if I focused less.

"Living is easy with eyes closed."

-The Beatles [John Lennon], Strawberry Fields Forever

♥ Lini.

The Greatest Thing You Will Ever Learn

In terms of my education, in some ways, I feel I've learned more in the last week than I had in the past four years of college.

And painlessly.

Seamlessly.

If only I could bottle this methodology, I could take it right to the bank.

Why hasn't all my schooling been this insightful?

Do they just save the most useful information for seniors because we need to build up to it, layer semester upon semester to reach a final few months of relevance?

Or am I delusional, imagining I picked up on something of importance in the last handful of days?

♥ Lini.

Now Playing

Some posters I found & loved while doing research when making a poster for my friend's play he's directing.

I'm about to not do something today out of sheer stubbornness and pride.

But I might regret it.

I wish I had more time to think about it.

Choices.

♥ Lini.

[Internet] Window Shopping

Endless windows to shop in when your windows are in a browser...

Dreaming of a new wardrobe, I want everything from Refinery 29.

♥ Lini.

Snow, Snow, Go The Eff Away.

Because as much as I love Stella McCartney's new stuff, I'd love being warm a lot more.

♥ Lini.

Voici Mon Secret

I know I'm all about skulls, rips & tears, leather, and dilapidated shit.

But if you promise not to tell, I will confess.

Occasionally a gown, preferably stunningly photographed, will take my breath away.

I do sorta wish I was Marie Antoinette after all.

There is nothing new except what has been forgotten.

Reine Marie herself, smart lady.

♥ Lini.

Momma Don't Preach

My mother, Katia.

Yesterday was 1/1/11. My dear friend was with me at 11:11 on this date and we made wishes as all those in our generation probably were as well. It reminded me of a story she had told me earlier about on all her birthdays. She blew out her candles, pressed her eyes shut, and wished for- well, she can't remember what she wished for. She can only remember hearing her mother shouting out "Happiness! Wish for happiness!", drowning out whatever desires and dreams she had thought up on her own.

I'm not sure why this story stuck with me so much. I mean to me, I think if one were truly happy, nothing else would matter. I like to think possessing the feeling of genuine, non-artificial happiness would give the owner to power to control everything else in their life, therefore making wishing for a perfect body, job, or spouse useless. On the other hand, I don't really buy into this whole "Money [or insert whatever else you want here] doesn't buy happiness" bullshit. What makes people unhappy? Being hungry, having debt, bad health, and in today's society let's be real, wanting things we can't have. Cure for all of the above, hate to say it, is a couple ole green backs.

So is it fair to force happiness upon someone? Is it fair to control your children? Mothers, maybe you've been told you know best, but mothers you're human too. And mothers, believe me, we children are overall thankful for the immeasurable amount of love you always give us. It's just sometimes we don't want happiness. We want a pony. Or a the star quarterback to ask us to prom. Or a new car. Or bigger boobs. Or for you to accept we're never going to be the child you prayed for because maybe we don't even believe in prayer ourselves.

Does anyone really even understand their children? Does anyone really even understand anyone?

Mothers, be good to your daughters.

[& sons, they're not too bad.]

-John Mayer, Daughters.

♥ Lini.

Mambo Italiano

ma non conoscete questo ancora

Adventure time?

♥ Lini.

Order & Progress

Do I keep wasting massive amounts of time doing nothing because I'm lazy or because I'm afraid of doing anything meaningful?

I know what I want.

Why am I not chasing after it instead of chilling with my cat looking out the window right now?

Sigh.

♥ Lini.

Love & Other Equally Temporary Drugs

My mother hates avocados.

She claims she ate far too many as a child. A lifetime's worth consumed far too quickly, now she can barely stomach the sight of them.

Seems a shame since she once loved avocados so much.

How do we learn to love things properly without destroying them? It's always too much, too little, too soon, or too late. When all around us relationships end, and generally either violently, legally, or publicly I just find it so hard to believe in long term commitment. The other day I caught myself being visibly angry at the shampoo I had been using for about three years because it just wasn't working out the same.

We broke up by the way. I'm seeing someone new in a sleeker bottle with a fresher scent.

What is the life expectancy of love? According to my calculations, if you factor in overinflated expectations, wandering eyes, the rare miracle of evoking genuine, reciprocated emotions, and the ever rising threshold of what it takes to keep people satisfied, love should last about 15.6 milliseconds. If a bottle of shampoo broke my heart, how can I trust a human being? I mean my hair follicles are sensitive, but I suspect my feelings may be a little bit more.

Just knowing myself, just seeing other people, just watching my generation evolve... I wonder if forever can be found, in anything from people to Pantene Pro-V*.

"I want so badly to believe that there is truth, that love is real."

-Clark Gable, Postal Service

*I do not use Pantene Pro-v. I do not recommend that use use Pantene Pro-V. It is just an example of shampoo.

♥ Lini.

X-Ray Visions

I wish pirate was still a career choice.

I really wish pirate alongside Orlando Bloom was a career choice.

Best. Wedding. Invite. EVER.

♥

Show me your teeth, teeth, teeth.

Homer looks so slender, Jesus!

While I do not feel displaying a human skull in your car is the best choice, I love bones. Skeletons. Joints.

As you can tell from the above, and previous 1000 skeleton posts.

Sorry, never gets old to me!

Seriously obsessed with that wedding invite.

♥ Lini.

Simplicty

I feel like I often overlook how beautiful simple things are.

Like the beauty of a simple life.

Sock puppets & working a 9-5 might make for a more blissful existence than diamonds and jet-setting.

But who knows?

I just cannot help but wonder if I am chasing after the right things.

Simple Kind of Life.

Never gets old, fave band.

♥ Lini.